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Monday, August 17, 2009

Bad Celebrity Themed Pinball Machines

By Ross Everett

Although celebrity tie-ins with pinball machines have been a part of the industry since the outset, the heyday of the genre was during the late 1970s and early 1980s. The release of the film version of The Whos rock opera Tommy launched the era of the licensed celebrity tie-in and itself spawned two high influential machines (Ballys Wizard featuring film stars Ann-Margret and Roger Daltry, and Captain Fantastic based on Elton Johns role as the pinball wizard).

For the next twenty years, pinball machines offered a tangible proof of having arrived for the celebrities they featured. As the 20th century drew to a close, this measure was somewhat diluted by the purchase of pinball manufacturers by large entertainment conglomerates, most notably Columbia Pictures who owned D. Gottlieb and Company for a time. This resulted in pinball machines rushed to market featuring the current would-be box office hit, particularly in the sci-fi/adventure genres.

The many celebrity tie-in machines have resulted in some downright bizarre choices. Below, a list of the worst of the celebrity themed pinball genre:

5) Phantom of the Opera by Data East (1990):

The Andrew Lloyd Weber Broadway adaptation of Phantom was red hot and what goes together better than Broadway shows and pinball? Just about anything, actually. Since the 1910 Gaston Leroux novel is in the public domain, they based it on that hoping to capitalize on the Broadway versions popularity without having to work out a deal with them. The result is a bizarre mish-mash of generic Phantom imagery, including a Christine Dae likeness for which the backglass artists daughter served as the model. Making this otherwise fun machine even more bizarre was the recurring sound effect of a whip hitting flesh followed by an anguished scream. Unless theres a pinball playing segment among the Broadway show fan and/or sadist demographic Im not aware of this is a real head scratcher.

4) Rescue: 911 by Premier Technology (1994):

Rescue: 911 was a big hit TV series at the time of the games release. Think a less exploitative version of Cops, but featuring real life footage of firemen and paramedics performing rescues. As a bonus, it was hosted by the venerable William Shatner. The game was fairly entertaining, featuring a helicopter that would rescue the ball with a magnetic lifeline and fly it to safety on the other side of the playfield. At the root of the theme, however, was the creepy reality that they were equating a pinball game with real life disasters and human tragedy.

3) Mike Bossy, The Scoring Machine by Gameplan, Inc. (1982):

Only the fact that this game never officially got released due to Gameplans financial struggles keeps it from finishing at #1 or #2. During the early 1980s there wasnt a more dominant hockey team than the New York Islanders, who won four straight Stanley Cups from 1980 to 1984. Despite having talent at every position, the Isles offensive weapon was undoubtedly Mike Bossy who scored 50 goals or more in 9 straight seasons. Even so, the Islanders may have been the quietest dynasty in sports history. Making matters worse was the backglass, which was little more than a big image of Bossys face with no other identifying characteristics like his name or team logo. Id speculate that at least half of the teams season ticket holders during that era wouldnt have been able to identify it was him on the backglass.

2) Dolly Parton by Bally Manufacturing (1978):

This game can be partially explained away due to Partons enormous popularity at the time. It also has the mitigating factor of being a pretty good game and was relatively popular for Bally, as it enjoyed a production run of nearly 7,500 units. It still begs the question Were they unable to reach an agreement to get Chers rights? Maybe Bally was trying to expand its demographic reach out of the male teenagers and 20 somethings who overwhelmingly supported pinball?

1) Roy Clark The Entertainer by Fascination, Inc (1977):

The only way to account for this machine is to understand the prevalence of drug use during the 1970s. The pitch meeting for this machine probably went like this:

Here we go gentlemen: a Roy Clark pinball machine. (sniff sniff) Do you smell what I smell? I dont know about you but Im smelling money.

Clark is by all accounts a good guy and is held in very high respect by his fellow musicians. But even in 1977, he wasnt anything of a draw to the pinball audience which skewed heavily toward males in their 20s.

Even Clarks long running TV series Hee Haw had its own machine, although it was an unlicensed 1973 game with some very poor likenesses of Grandpa Jones and Buck Owens on the backglass. Ive spent a lot of time researching the history of pinball and havent been able to uncover a country music subculture within the industry. From these machines, you'd think there was a big demographic of country music fans playing pinball in the 1970's.

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